Hello
A blog composed of the rants and ramblings of a messed up female. :P
“Last night I had a revelation
Somehow I have to make you pay
It's all about manipulation
And what it takes to get my way
I don't believe in soft solutions
No one makes a fool of me
Without receiving retribution
No one hurts me and goes free
I'll play on your fears, I'll leave you in tears
You'll never be the same, my friend
You're walking a line, it's a matter of time
You'll never rest easy again
I've got the power to bring you down"
-something I read from thinkexist.
'Till death do us part..
Sunday, March 28, 2010 @ 4:35 AM
[Will you promise to stay by my side...]
I must say, it took a while for me to have the time and will to start blogging again, but sadly, I believe this will be my last entry for.. who knows how long. The week, the month, the year, time shall fly before my troubles take lift. I'm blabbering now, the real reason I started typing again is because of tomorrow. Tomorrow will be the day of deliveration, of revelation, and of depression. Tomorrow the teachers shall announce who stays in and who's kicked out.
[For better of for worse..]
And I be loathe to go down without a farewall, without even a proper warning. I be loathe to have to go down really. I came to love the school along with it's headbashing lessons, the glares from a few strangers, the humiliations, the worse parts about life when you felt like simply giving up on everything. Dont get me wrong, there are good memories. The field trip spent annoying the people in the bus if I wasnt too busy sleeping, the laughtrips that made me feel weak and made hot tears flow down my cheeks, the moments when we all kept talking then suddenly everyone stops, the warm feeling of knowing there are peoople there for you. Yes, it's only been a year since we've known each other, but you cant deny the fact that we've been through a lot, rough roads and freeways and all. And I'm proud to say, enrolling in that school and meeting you losers was the happiest mistake that I've made in my life.
[For richer or for poorer...]
I know we all had our share of differences and annoyances(yeesh, especially between Mags and Nina, tough kind of people) but are you really willing to risk a year's worth of memories just because of difference? Are you willing to risk life's stream of happiness by refusing to be seen with a person out of annoyance? If a year had taught you nothing, then don't bother saying your farewells, it will only be assumed that you cant put differences aside for what's better. So, how about it, I-Adve, Freshmen batch 09-10, USHS students, are you willing to put differences aside and accept others for who they are and try actually knowing them first before loathing/judging.
[In Sickness and in Health...]
I would be so happy to say that we've always been there for each other... but then I would have been lying. Yes, during times of trouble, one could always find help and comfort in the arms of you people, but that depends on who needs the help. As I've said, people are willing to let differences stop them from having a blooming friendship. Help out, care for others, this world wasnt made to cater to only the whims of people similar with you. Breathe in and embrace the world filled with mysteries.
['Till death do us part...]
I now have to regretfully say farewell, whether it is just for tonight or for forever. This is where my speech comes up. I shant tarry any longer..
Thank you for everything you've done. Hope you change when I leave, you brats. Don't give the next freshmen a hard time now. Love you's.
Goodbye....
Moment of Truth; Attitude
Tuesday, December 29, 2009 @ 4:22 AM
Since I have gotten the truth about that dreadful topic(Love) out, me wants to clear things up about my attitude before anyone else makes a dreadful mistake.
- I am a person who will readily accept her faults when it is pointed out. If I shall decide to change those faults, that is entirely up to me, hate me if you want but I won't change just to please you.
- I am a person who is ready to give the benefit of the doubt. Unless it is logically stated and I have proved it myself, I will not hate someone just because of someone else's judgements.
- I am, occasionally, a girl of gossip. But I will not gossip if the topic is irrelevant.
- I like to keep my personal life to myself, thank you. Unless I decide to tell you anything, I will not mention anything.
- I would like to keep my privacy. So, please, do not give out any information about me, be it contact details or even my name.
- If you hate me, that is you're problem, not mine. Make it known publicly, I couldnt care less. Especially if you hate me for no apparent reason.
- I hate flirts, for me, they are the lowest kind of human beings.
- I hate cheaters and liars. You have no right to meddle in my life and ruin it for me.
- My attitude mainly reflects the person I am interacting with, if you are boring, then so am I. If you hate me because of this, it's purely you're fault, really.
- I believe that I am naturally smart. Hell, I passed elementary and the first 2 quarters of freshman year by reviewing the day of the exam. What more if I actually studied?
Bye once more,
Gail.
Potential Boyfriend Survey-ey
Wednesday, December 23, 2009 @ 8:01 PM
Got bored so I decided to answer a survey and this one made me laugh so damn much. :D
1.Dapat ba gwapo?
- siguro... kahit cute man lang ehh xD
2. Matalino?
- sige ba. hindi naman pwedeng tanga na nga ako, tanga pa siya.
3. Preferred Age?
-same age as me... or matanda ng konti, idfk.
4. Preferred height?
- sus. basta mas matangkad sakin. :P
5. How about sense of humor?
- YESHH.
6. How about piercings?
- d00d, no. that's disgusting.
7. Accepts you for who you are?
- duh.
8. Pink hair?
- GAYY xD
9. mushy or no?
- idc.
10. Thin or fat?
- whatever.
11. Moreno or chinito or mestizo?
- wait. moreno=dark, chinito=slightly dark, mestizo=white, correct? umm... mestizo? idc.
12. Long hair or short hair?
- basta wag mas mahaba sa buhok ko, gayy na yun! :D astig kung layered, korean epek. XD
13. Plastic or metal?
- ano? lmfao. ewan ko ba.
14. Smells good?
- Of course!
15. Smoker?
- ew, NO
16. Drinker?
- NO.
17. Boy-next-door type?
- Sige ba...
18. Musically inclined?
- HELL YES! XD
19. Plays piano?
- pwede rinn xD
20. Plays bass and/or acoustic guitar?
- YES. lalo na kung acoustic guitar! :D
21. Plays violin?
- okay rin xD
22. Sings very good?
- sure.
23. Vain?
- haha. wag na.
24. With glasses?
- if bagay.
25. With braces?
- ayoko nga xD
26. Shy type?
- damn NO. ayoko na, pag-ganun wala akong makaka-usap. haha
27. Rebel or good boy?
- either. kung rebel, meteor garden/boys over flowers/hana kimi epek. XD
28. Active or passive?
- whut? XD
29. tight or bomb?
- wtf??
30. Singer or dancer?
- either. i love both. XD
31. Suplado?
- pwede rin. para parehas kame. haha
32. Hiphop?
- err.....
33. Earrings?
- NO.
35. Torpe?
- lahat naman ng boys sakin torpe. haha. i'd prefer someone who's not tho. XD
36. Mr. count-my-ex-girlfriends-until-you-drop?
- DUH NO.
37. Dimples?
- dimples? sus.
38. Bookworm?
- sure (:
39. Mr. love letter?
- ahaha. matatawa lang ako dyan xD
40. Makulit?
- Ayos ayos.
41. Flirt?
- NO.
42. Poem writer?
- naks naman, sige ba. song writer pa e. :D
43. Serious?
- On times.
44. Campus crush?
- sure. mamatay sila sa inggit! BWAHAHAAHAH! >:D
45. Painter ..?
- Not necessary.
46. Religious?
- kahit hindi gano. kung uber-religious, hindi ko na siya matatake. :P
47. Alaskador?
- ???
48. Computer games geek? Or internet freak
- lmfao. internet. para may kachat ako. :P
49. Speaks 20 languages?
- naks namann... sige ba XD
50. Loyal o faithful?
- Both (:
NO. DAMMIT. 0__0
@ 4:25 AM
Mental note: Never link blog in YM if people involved are friends there.
d00ds, wtf! NO. damn. damn. damn. damn. damn. This is basically a rant 95% made up of swear words. So scroll down if you want. *ahem* Let's continue..... *breath in* damn. x___X Guess I deserved that for ranting too much.. and for being a dramatic bitch. But who cares? Sometimes you're on top and sometimes you're low under 50 feet of crap. This is about the post with relevance to the Lantern parade. Screw that. That was days ago. I like someone else now. No, I am not a freakin' whore, I'm saying I LIKE them, not I LOVE them, got it? I have a crush on thousands, judge me if you will. There is still that difference between like and love and honestly, I love no one but myself right now. This is a rushed post, excuse the grammar errors. Ask me personally why the hell I'm reacting like this.
Just a few inches under that 50 feet of crap,
Gail.
But I never told you everything, I'm losing hope and faded dreams and every single memory along the way.
Friday, December 18, 2009 @ 10:47 PM
Lantern kagabi. Sweet moment dapat. Pero wala din, I ended up being disappointed... as usual. To understand this rant of mine, I need to share a story with you, it's a story that happened last Thursday night up to today. There are two people who are involved in this, aside from me, let's call the guy 'Ocean' and the girl 'Oil'. For fun.
Well, I was texting Ocean last Thursday night, it was 7 up to 9. Truth be told, I was somewhat 'infatuated' with him... that sounds disgusting, let's just say I have/had a crush on him. He was texting things like "Ligawan kaya kita, try lang.", "Sa lantern, malamig pag gabi, kailangan mo ng kayakap?" and "Basta, date tayo bukas!". Anyone who would read this would think he was serious, also he kept saying it wasnt a freakin joke. I asked Guia and she agreed with me. Dood, my heart was pounding all night. On the following morning, I can't say we were so close. As usual, it was as if neither of us existed. That continued until the parade. Boomie's(new person, though she is irrelevent) arm was around his as if he was her escort. For revenge, I got some escorts of my own through out the whole parade, hoping he would notice. I got Edward, Brandon, Alecx, and Mikael. Not sure if that plan worked though. When we got to the Oval, I didnt see him until about 8 or 9, I was getting lonely and felt like he wasnt the guy that texted me all those things the other night, so I grabbed random people(Krizza and Mikael, then Ryan, then Karla, Annarea, Janelle, and Nariel, then Joshua Carl) and asked if they would want to walk a little, all agreed and so we did. It was a dumb excuse to look for him. When it was about 9, we were all together, sitting on the grass and then he came to join or little group. I don't know why, but I was expecting him to come sit by me and talk and fullfill those promises he texted. I waited for a while, then I grabbed a random person and we walked, we went back to the group after a few minutes though, I sat again and after a while, he did sit by me and talked. He asked where I went, I couldnt help but think he was watching/ looking for me and/or was concerned. I said I just took a walk around with *insert name of guy here*, yes, it was a plan to make him jealous. He said "Libot tayo", at that time, I was putting on my jacket so I told him to wait. When I was done, I felt awkward to bring the subject up and then just sat there. It felt horrible, so I lay down on the grass, he did the same, we talked and looked at the stars. I was thinking "Omigod! He was fucking serious!", until Edward brought up a topic about Oil. What the fuck!? Who the hell is she?! And what's this about Ocean giving her a stuff toy? Ocean laughed and said Oil was somewhere here. I could no longer bring myself to talk, I wanted to tease him but I couldnt open my mouth. After a while, he stood up, and went to Oil. All night he was with her, I wanted to disturb them but that would be really rude. I recall Krizza asking Ocean "Nililigawan mo ba si *insert Oil's real name here*?", he patted Krizza slightly and quickly and said "Oo", then stood up and left. What the fuck. I was used, toyed with and betrayed. He is a fucking jerk and I will never forgive him. Now? I srsly dont like him. Kill me if I go near him.
Procrastinator,
Gail.
Quotable Quotes, part II
Sunday, November 29, 2009 @ 9:52 PM
"Ako'y iyo, Ikaw ay akin."
-Malagant Escudero. Nung pinabasa sa Values nung Poem na "Iyo'y iyo, aki'y akin."
"Ang akin ay akin, ang iyo ay akin, ang hindi sa akin ay mapapasaakin."
- Aaron Torres. Another version of "Iyo'y iyo, aki'y akin."
"Dinidiretso po nila yung..umm.. They STRAIGHT."
- Malagant Escudero. Nung report sa Soc. Sci. FTW.
"Prejudice."
- Malagant Escudero. Alam ko'ng walang nakakatawa sa word na yan, natuwa lang ako dahil ang pagsabi niya nyan ay "Pre-dyu-dais."
"Kristian: Halos lahat kaya sa CL. Ung group 1 sa CL
Bea: Kila Krizza sila
Kristian: Dito!
Ako: Kila Krizza.
Kristian: Edi kila Krizza. Group 2 dito, tama? San yung group 3?
Ako: Group 3 ata tayo?
Kristian: AI. Oo nga. *tawa* Eh ung group 4?
Ako: May group 4 ba?
Kristian: Ai! *tawa*
Bea: Hay nako, Kristian. Goodluck sa mga pinagsasabi mo."
- Kristian Pajela. Piccard. Nung Saturday.
- Yung pagkanta ni Emerson Ong sa Basketcase(Greenday) nung Graduation. The whole song was a joke. Nakakatawa yung pagkanta niya at ung pagbigkas niya.
ROFLMAO,
Gail.
Mortified. The truth is out.
@ 9:14 PM
One of the most simple ways of inflicting pain on yourself is doing something you regret. I'm not saying that I regret my decision, well, atleast not too much. I liked him but there were times when I hated him and could have just screamed 'bloody hell'. For every moment that I hated him, my mind judged him harshly. Thinking he's an annoyance, that he's ignorant of who I am and how I feel, that in reality he's an idiot. It's funny how we can say so many reasons to hate a person yet whenever we're asked why we like them our principle reaction would be to shrug and say 'I dont know and I don't care.' Whenever I catch a glimpse of him though, these harsh judgments always seem to fade away. Like he's someone else other than the guy I was bad mouthing a few seconds ago. It's also strange that whenever I'm angry or sad, even if he's the reason for that pain, I tend to grab the stuff toy he gave. Not to hug it, mind you. But to strangle it and use it as a punching bag.
I remember the second week of school I asked Cindy the name of the guy who walked past us. She said she knew him well, that he was her former crush and when he found out about her feelings, he ignored her. Fun. That was seriously too much information than I needed. Seriously. Then there was a time when Jem said he(I guess it is now evident that I don't want to type his name) was asking for my number. I agreed that she could give it to him, how bad could it be? I didnt know then that it was yet another turning point in my life. After a couple of days, he said it. He said he liked me. A few days after that(or was it a week?) I told him I liked him. Saying, as an excuse, that I had to say that because of a bet. A lie, of course.
July 24. Me and Rica were joking around. She was telling me about kuya June. Wonderful topic. Made me want to sleep right then and there. She was playing with my phone and for fun, she was joking that he would text him and tell him that I was agreeing to be his GF. I didnt mind, I knew she could never do it.... and then she did. Damn. I was like "Oh God! Please run out of load. Please dont get sent. Please. Please. Please." as I grabbed my phone to cancel the message.... too late. Fuck. Now I had a friggin' boyfriend. Bloody hell. It wouldnt have been nice to tell him that it was a joke or a mistake. So I just agreed to the joke. I didn't really care. Who knows? This might be fun... or not.
Whenever I was with him, he was always so damn quiet. Yes, he made up for it with material things, but what the hell did I care about that? I'm not materialistic, honestly. I couldn't help thinking, 'what if I stopped Rica?', then I wouldnt be stuck in this hellhole of silence. I don't get along with people who are quiet, because I am talkative. It was excruciatingly painful on my part to shut up. I fought with him, a lot. Just so he would break up with me. No use, what so freaking ever. So then it happened, on November 28, I broke up with him. I couldn't take it anymore. I don't know how to shut up.
This was basically a story of another ruined relationship. I will not say 'ruined love' because honestly, love was one-sided.
Changing this world one imperfection at a time,
Gail.
I remember the second week of school I asked Cindy the name of the guy who walked past us. She said she knew him well, that he was her former crush and when he found out about her feelings, he ignored her. Fun. That was seriously too much information than I needed. Seriously. Then there was a time when Jem said he(I guess it is now evident that I don't want to type his name) was asking for my number. I agreed that she could give it to him, how bad could it be? I didnt know then that it was yet another turning point in my life. After a couple of days, he said it. He said he liked me. A few days after that(or was it a week?) I told him I liked him. Saying, as an excuse, that I had to say that because of a bet. A lie, of course.
July 24. Me and Rica were joking around. She was telling me about kuya June. Wonderful topic. Made me want to sleep right then and there. She was playing with my phone and for fun, she was joking that he would text him and tell him that I was agreeing to be his GF. I didnt mind, I knew she could never do it.... and then she did. Damn. I was like "Oh God! Please run out of load. Please dont get sent. Please. Please. Please." as I grabbed my phone to cancel the message.... too late. Fuck. Now I had a friggin' boyfriend. Bloody hell. It wouldnt have been nice to tell him that it was a joke or a mistake. So I just agreed to the joke. I didn't really care. Who knows? This might be fun... or not.
Whenever I was with him, he was always so damn quiet. Yes, he made up for it with material things, but what the hell did I care about that? I'm not materialistic, honestly. I couldn't help thinking, 'what if I stopped Rica?', then I wouldnt be stuck in this hellhole of silence. I don't get along with people who are quiet, because I am talkative. It was excruciatingly painful on my part to shut up. I fought with him, a lot. Just so he would break up with me. No use, what so freaking ever. So then it happened, on November 28, I broke up with him. I couldn't take it anymore. I don't know how to shut up.
This was basically a story of another ruined relationship. I will not say 'ruined love' because honestly, love was one-sided.
Changing this world one imperfection at a time,
Gail.
meet me
My name's Patricia Gail.I'm a happily random person. I hate alot of
things. I cuss.. a lot. Judge me for that if you want, I couldnt care
less. I'm violent, I enjoy seeing bloodshed, I enjoy reading about it
too. My mind is more cynical than you think. I get pissed off easily,
even though from time to time I'm the one that pisses people off.I'm fair-toned. I'm insane. I'm the modern-day Grudge. ;) I spend
most of my time staring into space and plotting how to take over the
world. HAHA. Born on 1996; the year of Legends. Among these legends, I shall be the ruler, I shall take over the universe, to infinity and beyond! 'nuff said.
Affiliates
Lindsay
Betina
Nicx
Cham
TGPH Sucks
Kai
Vito
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
friend
Crediits
Rin for the base codes.Photobucket for image hosting.
Gail/Me for the picture.
Tagboard
ShoutMix chat widget
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Archives
By post:
> 'Till death do us part..
> Moment of Truth; Attitude
> Potential Boyfriend Survey-ey
> NO. DAMMIT. 0__0
> But I never told you everything, I'm losing hope a...
> Quotable Quotes, part II
> Mortified. The truth is out.
> Phobic, beybe! :P
> Quotable Quotes
> Divine Intervention; Long awaited Revelation
By month:
> October 2009
> November 2009
> December 2009
> March 2010